I’ve often spoken about my love for Sri Lanka and my most recent trip back reaffirmed so beautifully what I already knew to be true. The feelings that came rushing back to me immediately as my feet touched the soil prompted me to remember that some bonds never weaken; instead they grow over time, no matter the distance.
Sri Lanka has often been described as the Pearl of the Indian Ocean in description of its natural beauty. I suppose I’ve taken that for granted over time but something I’ve been working on recently is being present in the moment and being grateful for every experience. This has tended to mean that I’m more open to viewing the world positively and therefore more able to find joy in the little things.
I’ve previously explained the wave of emotions that come over me when I’m on a plane that lands in Sri Lanka. The feeling is akin to one where my entire being knows that it is home, it is where it truly belongs. When I’m back in Colombo, I tend to spend great lengths of time looking out into the ocean, focusing on the sea breeze and watching in awe as the waves come rhythmically crashing into the shoreline. For some reason, more than usual, I then feel like I can stop holding my breath and simply breathe again. All of a sudden everything makes sense and it feels like everything in life is where it should be.
There is something to say about the feeling of belonging in general. Of understanding that this where my ancestors walked and lived for multiple generations before. There’s something that tugs at my heart strings and welcomes me home with a long exhale. It automatically brings about reminders of the connection to my roots and a deep feeling of relief; like in an instant all my problems melt away as my homeland holds me in a deep, warm embrace.
Perhaps all of this is part of the island life mentality also, where your surroundings and the pace of daily life make you slow down and appreciate the small things. At a time when I’m feeling so abundantly lost and unsure of my path in life, being back in Sri Lanka feels like a conversation with a close friend who assures me that there is still so much beauty in this world which is left to be discovered.
This trip I made a journey with my extended family to one of the Northern most points on the island, Jaffna. As we made our way via car through the island, the only thing I could think of is that this place is truly heaven on earth. I remember looking out of the window of the van we were travelling and being transfixed. I truly felt that these were the moments that I would remember forever. The moments that I had longed for and yearned for in the past when I hoped for incredible life experiences.
What this has meant is that for the first time in a long time, I feel like myself. I feel like I can experience things without holding my breath. I’m allowing myself to laugh heartily without expecting an impending doom to occur immediately afterwards. The truth is that this trip filled my cup in a way that I didn’t expect it to. It wasn’t without its difficulties and almost nothing went to plan but there was still joy to be found within the chaos. It pushed me to believe again, to give into the beauty of nature, to slow down and live life most simply.
What I know now is that I will never take moments like these for granted. I’m now, more than ever, entirely aware that I will always truly feel at peace in Sri Lanka. Like my heart knows that this is where I belong; where the sands of the soil run through my blood. The beauty of the place of my birth is utterly unmatched and no matter how far I travel, nothing will ever beat it.
As for where I am in life right now, truthfully I have no idea where I’m headed or what life has in store for me. But the lesson that so much hardship has brutally taught me is to appreciate each day, each moment, each second for what it is; a gift. My experiences have made me realise that life rarely goes to plan but that potentially the joy within this existence is to be found in the unknown.
HOME
There’s something about coming home.
About being in your heartland.
Something where your soul just knows
This is where your heart resides
Where generations of ancestors came before you.
This land is your heart, it is your soul.
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